Believe it or not, I am pretty cautious with my emotions. I was watching The Bachelorette and Jason was talking about having "body armor," and I think that is a very accurate way of describing it. However, when he was talking during the After the Final Rose segment, he confessed that he doesn't have any body armor at all. That didn't surprise me. He was able to fall in love so quickly because once he allowed himself to be vulnerable and open at all, there was no turning back. That's how I am. I consciously and unconsciously do a lot of things to avoid letting myself be hurt. And I'm really pretty good at it. It may sound depressing, but I have been hurt enough in the past that I would prefer not to get close to very many people to the alternative. But I am also such a hopeless romantic that I can't just deny that part of myself either. So it is sort of like I am always evaluating situations to determine if I want to make the choice to be vulnerable in case it might be worth it in a particular situation. Once I make that decision, it's not like it means I'm in love at all; it means I want to let someone know me and I want to know them so that we can discover if there could be something great between us. However, I choose to be vulnerable so rarely that I feel like guys should know that I almost consider that to be a special gift I'm offering them, and therefore realize that I am going to be hurt if they reject my offer of getting to know me for real. Of course they probably have no idea that all this is going on in my head and if they did, they would just think I was crazy or at least arrogant to think I was doing them some sort of favor.